


solace here, in your arms

by softlvs



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Character Study, Fluff, Found Family Feels, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection?, M/M, No beta we die like wwx, and a lot of talk about feelings, of sorts, this is just xiaoyang cuddling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:48:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlvs/pseuds/softlvs
Summary: Xiaojun has bad days—days where he comes home, curls up in bed and just cries till his face is awfully puffed up and red and he has finished his tissue stash. Then, there’s the other kind of bad days—the one where tiredness seeps into his bones and refuses to let go of him no matter what he does, where it feels like he’s wading through a marsh—heavy, slow steps, mud weighing him down and a confusing fog surrounding him, making him feel sluggish and tired. Those days are harder than the ones he comes home ready to cry because there isn’t any real way to get through them except force himself to push through.
Relationships: Liu Yang Yang & Xiao De Jun | Xiao Jun, OT7 - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	solace here, in your arms

Xiaojun has bad days—days where he comes home, curls up in bed and just cries till his face is awfully puffed up and red and he has finished his tissue stash. Then, there’s the other kind of bad days—the one where tiredness seeps into his bones and refuses to let go of him no matter what he does, where it feels like he’s wading through a marsh—heavy, slow steps, mud weighing him down and a confusing fog surrounding him, making him feel sluggish and tired. Those days are harder than the ones he comes home ready to cry because there isn’t any real way to get through them except force himself to push through. 

Logically, Xiaojun knows it’s a culmination of fear, homesickness, and whatever awful thing that has occurred recently making a fog of sadness that is all permeating, engulfing all the things from which he derives his happiness and making it impossible to see forward. On days like these—on days like today, one headlight in the smog lighting up the way in front of him is his dorm. 

As cheesy as it sounds ,  it's his safe space, the place where he is able to find strength to make it through horrible days, the place where he's able to centre himself and find a home miles away from home.

Sometimes, it's not just him going through bad times, sometimes he shares his sad times, his difficulties with others. Usually, that's Yang Yang. For all their differences and all their petty fights, they have a odd way of knowing when the other is going through a tough time, a special sixth sense that immediately alerts them to the others sadness. Usually—and oddly, they tend to be sad together. Whatever the reason behind their at-times-inexplicable sadness—whether a bad day thanks to their company, their saesangs or their fans; or because they happened to suffer from some personal loss, or, on a lighter note, watch a sad movie together—Xiaojun and Yang Yang have found that the best way to deal with it is very simple—their current positions.

Yang Yang is almost half curled up on Xiaojun's lap, hands around his chest, head resting on his shoulders making himself as small as possible. Xiaojun is resting his head on Yang Yang's, legs half wrapped around him. Bella lies on top of them both, somehow always knowing that the two of them being in such a position means that they're both not doing well, in need of comfort and that somehow, her presence helps. Bella is Xiaojun’s pride and joy for a reason, no other dog or person can ever compare to her.

It doesn't exactly dispel the fog of sadness, but Xiaojun is able to breathe easier. The warmth of another body so close to his is comforting and grounding, allowing Xiaojun to navigate through the foggy marsh with more ease and less fear and apprehension.

He suspects it's the same for Yang Yang who prefers to compartmentalize and focus on everything but his problems. However, as much as he prefers to avoid his problems and not allow anyone to know about them, he's not the best at hiding how he feels—at least in Xiaojun's eyes. In hindsight, that's probably because of all the time they've spent together-  _ and _ apart. Living in close quarters also tends to teach you more about a person than you sometimes care to know. In Xiaojun’s case, he doesn’t mind knowing all the small things that make everyone around him tick, it’s oddly comforting, and they’re his family after all, no matter how insufferable they all(especially Yang Yang) can be.

Yang Yang already feels more relaxed around him. Hands which were previously gripping Xiaojun like a lifeline—hard enough to probably leave bruises—were now gentle grips, more of a reminder of his presence rather than a grip that spoke for his troubles. He was breathing easier too and Xiaojun realises they are breathing in tandem. Slowly, they both find their footing, and one by one, the bad thoughts leave, the fog slowly dissipates, and Xiaojun becomes more aware of himself and his surroundings. 

His leg has fallen asleep around Yang Yang, feeling like static of the old box TV’s and he tries to move it a bit and try not to disturb either Yang Yang or Bella. The TV is on, probably some drama on JTBC softly playing in the background, making for a nice white noise. 

There’s noises coming from the kitchen area, someone’s cooking and since their dorm aunty is on a vacation, that likely means it’s Kun or Sicheng, or  _ both _ of them(because that is a thing now) with Kun slowly losing his mind as he tries to teach Sicheng how to properly cut the vegetables or something. However, since it smells heavenly and there isn’t too much bickering, they’re probably doing remarkably well with the dish—a rare occurrence, or they’re trying to keep it down knowing XIaojun and Yang Yang’s moods and Xiaojun appreciates the thought of both

There’s very soft music playing from the direction of their rooms, sounds of birds and flowing water—Ten. He’s probably trying to meditate. He realises after a moment that Louis is lying beside him, very oddly calm and quiet, perhaps sensing the mood of the dorm. 

There’s a loud beep that comes from the door—Lucas and Hendery are home. Louis bounds over to them and Lucas joyfully greets the kitty and immediately picks him up. Hendery’s attention however falls on the two cuddling on the mats of their living room and he carefully makes his way through the organized mess of their home to them. Yang Yang and Xiaojun both give him half hearted greetings and Hendery grins down at them. 

Xiaojun realises his intention a moment too late. 

“Wait, wait don’t-” too late. Now Xiaojun has two grown men on him and poor old him is getting crushed. Lucas notices them and yells out a me too and then there’s an additional fourth. Bella barks and jumps onto the couch disgruntled. Xiaojun would complain and push them off, but the weight is nice and good. 

Yang Yang is grinning into his neck and Hendery is nuzzling into the other side of the neck. Lucas still has Louis in his hands who is now loudly mewling and the somber mood is gone, replaced by familiar warmth filling up his chest and making it feel like he will burst with all he’s feeling. 

Ten comes out a moment later grumbling about how loud they are but he sees the slowly growing puppy pile in the living room with Yang Yang and Xiaojun at the bottom of it and instead grins and pulls out his phone to snap a quick picture of them. Xiaojun is too tired to tell him to delete it so he just fake glowers. Kun seems to be finished with his dish and comes out to the living room with Sicheng in tow. Unlike the rest of the heathens, he is content to sit beside Bella and play with Bella. Sicheng in usual Sicheng fashion ends up bickering with Ten about something so utterly mundane it makes Xiaojun smile. 

All the thoughts and the sadness isn’t gone, but surrounded with his second family, being cuddled to death by three of them, it’s easier to breathe, easier to laugh, to extract his hand from where it’s trapped between Yang Yang and Hendery to run his hand through YangYnag’s hair. Their youngest usually tends to take a lot longer than him to find his way out of such moods and Xiaojun is always happy to be there for him in whatever capacity he needs him.

It’s going to be alright. They’re probably going to eat before the dishes that Kun and Winwin cooked cool down and they’re going to play games and Xiaojun will try to read a book and fall asleep and wake up tomorrow morning to the same responsibilities but a new day. He will be alright. Yang Yang in his lap is going to be alright. 

Everything will be alright eventually. 

**Author's Note:**

> domestic nct have me by a chokehold and hence why despite having multiple wips, this is the one i finished and am publishing as my first fic in this fandom :D i couldn't get the image of dejun and yangyang hugging when they were sad out of my head since dejun first mentioned it and hence. here we go.
> 
> kudos and comments appreciated!
> 
> my [twt](https://twitter.com/deardarkdesires)  
> my [cc](https://curiouscat.me/deardarkdesires)


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